The Malibu Times

Earlier this week, Bridget Graham of the Malibu Times interviewed me for an article to help promote the marrow drives on the Pepperdine Campus this weekend. The drives are in honor of Robert Corrales, a beloved Alumnus who is fighting Leukemia and in need of a marrow match.

I picked up the paper last night and to my surprise, the article was the Featured Story of the "MALIBU LIFE" section! The wonderful news, really, is that I hope that the article brings more people to the marrow drives, thus more potential donors onto the registry! Here is the online version of the article if you would like more information on this weekend's marrow drives.

Yesterday, we held the first drive of this week during the game versus USC. Having gone to USC as an undergrad, I found myself torn between two loyalties, but in the end the game was about good sportsmanship and good baseball. Both SC and Pepperdine folks were signing up. When it comes to saving lives, teamwork knows no boundaries.

Before the game, I had the honor to speak in front of the stadium crowd. Despite an amusing start with a faulty mic, I was thrilled to be on the field. It is somewhat surreal to hear your voice echoing in the sky, with the Pacific churning in the background behind you, talking about how you almost died, if not for one hero.


Here are some of the volunteers and organizers of the marrow drives at Pepperdine. (From L to R) Tiara Dole, Toni Nocita, Brian Watson, Heather Collart, and Janet Slightam. And thanks also to Andre Fontenelle, cameraman extraordinaire, who came to document the event!

By the way, Pepperdine won 8-5 thanks to a rally in the eigth-inning that took off with a homer by Nate Johnson.

Pepperdine University, Malibu Campus Marrow Drives:
Friday, April 17 - 2pm to 5pm at the Eddy D. Field Baseball Stadium
Saturday, April 18 - 12pm to 3pm at the Eddy D. Field Baseball Stadium

Hope to see you there!
xxo

WHY?!

I'm devastated to report that my sister's cancer has relapsed. As most of you know, my brother and I also fought Lymphoma.

When will this end?

Please pray for her health.
And for the strength of her husband, Tony.


Christine


ADDENDUM: September 12, 2008 :

It appears that my sister wants her story to remain private at this time. In respect for my sister's wishes, this blog will remain focused on the life-affirming events and people in my healing journey.

In the NEWS this week!

The surgery went smoothly last Friday and I've been at home recovering
nicely. Went off the powerful pain meds this morning after last
night's hallucinations proved to be TOO creepy for me to handle!

This Thursday, August 14, my story will be on KCBS/KCAl as part of a
larger story for City of Hope and ThinkCure. The segment is scheduled
to air during the newscasts on CBS during the 6A and 5P shows. It
also airs on KCAL during the Noon, 4P, 8P, 10P.

This Saturday somewhere in the 2 o'clock hour (to be confirmed), I
will be on KABC radio as part of a ThinkCure telethon to raise money to fight cancer.


For those who have been patiently waiting (thank you!) I finally set up a separate "college fund" account. I wanted to name it "Christine's College Fund" but for various reasons the checks still have to be made out to my name. "College Fund" should be written in the memo area. After so much uncertainty, I can't describe how wonderful it feels to be making goals for the future. I never realized what a luxury that was before. Thanks again to those who have sent gifts of support! Classes start in two weeks!

:)

much love,
Christine


Christine's College Fund
10008 National Blvd. #174
Los Angeles, CA 90034

Good News and Bad News

I was at City of Hope today for the official, rare, wondrous moment that all BMT patients pray and hope for: The two-year follow-up appointment. It’s an odd thing to look forward to… a hospital appointment with a doctor... But for someone who is told they would likely NOT see that day, it is a day welcomed indeed.

It took over two years but my blood counts are FINALLY totally normal! Yes, even those stubborn Red Blood Cells are back to regular levels. I’m not anemic anymore. My body can fight a cold. I don’t have to worry about bleeding to death. My brain is getting a decent supply of oxygen. No more excuses. Yay!

In the midst of our mini-celebration, I shared with Dr. Nade about how I have watched too many friends succumb to their disease - Friends who once stood with me, side-by-side. Sometimes it felt like these friends and I were on the battlefield together, holding our ground united. But soon the bullets began to hail and one-by-one they started to fall and all I could do was to keep holding my ground and not give in or give up, lest they die in vain. I thanked Dr. Nade for saving my life. She was the wizard behind the BMT. She was the bulletproof vest that pulled me through. We both teared up and hugged. Then, feeling a need to escape from the emotional vise, we just as quickly broke away and made hasty exits. Funny how we humans can be about emotions.


Well, at this point you’re probably wondering, “What’s the good news and the bad news?” Well…


I am THRILLED to announce that I have been accepted into the Graduate MFA Writing program at Pepperdine University! The program’s focus will be Writing for Screen & TV. Not many of you know that back in 2002, I had been stashing money away and was in the midst of applying to graduate schools when cancer took that all away. Now my dream of attaining a Masters Degree is finally in reach after being put on hold for the six years of my cancer struggle.

The bad news? I applied to Pepperdine enticed by the fact that the department said they would probably be able to give me a full-scholarship. Unfortunately, according to the head of the department, the monies they thought they would be allocating did not come to fruition. So instead, I have a scholarship that will only cover 10% of my tuition and a TA’ship that will cover daily expenses. I’ve already applied to a few outside scholarships and I’m planning to work all weekend to find other sources.

So I’m asking for help. I know we are all busy, but if anyone has any ideas or knows of any resources / foundations / funds / organizations or angels who may be poised to help, please let me know. After coming this far, I don’t want to give up.

Much love,
Christine

BMT Reunion/Press Conference Photos

I've been so busy lately, but I was FINALLY able to get some photos from the BMT Reunion from April 25th up on Flickr. It was the biggest turn-out for the press conference in the history of City of Hope! I'm still working on the captions and such but for those who missed the day, enjoy...




By the way, a reporter at the event talked to my parents and wrote a nice post on his blog.

xxo,
Christine

BrittiCares (In Honor of Francis Rex)

Today would have been my brother, Francis Rex's 34th Birthday. In his memory I participated in the annual BrittiCares "Smile for Life" 5K in Pacific Palisades.

BrittiCares was founded by Britti Henderson, a beautiful and bright and talented girl who enjoyed life to the fullest. At the age of ten, she was diagnosed with bone cancer. During her treatment and remission, she and her parents founded the non-profit organization dedicated to "embracing children diagnosed with cancer through the power of love." Sadly, a year later the cancer returned, this time in the form of Leukemia. Britti was only 13 years old when she passed away but her spirit and legacy live on in her BrittiCares foundation.


I met Britti's mother at the Pan-African Film Festival Marrow Drive for Jerome Williams a few months ago. She is an amazing woman. We talked about Britti and Francis Rex and the joys and sorrows of their memories. Imagine the shock and delight we both shared when it was discovered that the BrittiCare's annual 5K was scheduled on the same day as my brother's birthday! We had one of those "It was meant to be" moments.

Today my friend Frances M joined me in the Run/Walk. I pinned Rex's photo on my shirt and carried his photo with me.

Chris Tucker, most famous for his role opposite Jackie Chan in the "Rush Hour" movies, stayed all day to show his support. We had a chance to meet before kicking off the 5K with a "Survivor's Lap", honoring all cancer survivor's in attendance. Chris Tucker supports efforts to sign up more minorities onto the marrow registry, especially black Americans of African, Caribbean and mixed descent.

It was an inspiring day. Even the Goodyear blimp showed up and sent greetings down to all the participants on its huge electronic marquee.



The icing on the cake was being able to meet David Joyner, the guy who is THE guy who played Barney the purple dinosaur! And yes, "Barney" supports the cancer fight as well! That's him in the picture on the lower right. (That's also him as "Hip Hop Harry" in the picture in the upper right, doing the Survivor's lap with Chris Tucker and me.)


Britti will always be remembered as a brave and remarkable girl. To a great extent, I believe it is because she has the most loving and inspiring parents the world has ever seen.

Love,
Christine

KABC Channel 7 News

Family is still in town, otherwise I would write more but here is the link to the ABC News Story by Denise Dador who covered the momentous event on Friday.



Blessings,
Christine

Live Like You were Dying

Fly now dear one
to your new home above
though my arms ache to hold you
I know you are safe in the loving arms of our Father
I lay my hand on my heart
and say another prayer

though I cry out for the pain you endured
I know that you are no longer suffering
and when I look up at the stars tonight
May you lay your hand on your heart
and smile down upon us all
and love like sunshine moonbeams
will still rush between us


The best way to remember those who've left us too soon is to live life fully, to dance while on this earth, as we carry their spirits within us.

Looking back on all the friends lost to cancer too soon, remembering, crying, praying, questioning and eventually accepting- what soon happens inside is a resolve. A resolve that is heart-strong and love-fierce.

Cancer may kill the body and while that is already devastating, if we allow it to also kill our soul, that is tragic.

I’ve seen people whose bodies survived cancer but whose souls did not. And yet others, such as Britti, who did not survive her cancer but whose soul and spirit lives on. Cancer can be tenacious, but so can we.

Whenever I am in a place where I hesitate out of fear (such as shyness or uncertainty) I remember. I remember the fighting spirits of those before and think to myself “If they were given the chance to live just one more day and were right here at this very moment… what would they do?"

Remembering Robin and her amazing spirit and love of life. Remembering how she lived fully, with grace and beauty even as she knew she was slowly dying. Living for her daughter and continuing to love and be there for her husband and family. Remembering that no matter how dire the circumstances, she always took the bull by the horns…

And remembering that Tim McGraw song that goes…

“I went Skydiving
I went Rocky Mountain climbing
I went 2.7 seconds on a bull named FuManchu…”

And happening to be at a Western-style cowboy bar recently….

Knowing how fun-loving she was, I imagined that Robin was there with me and I thought "If Robin was right here at this very moment… what would she do?"

And then a smile came to my face.

"Alright Robin, this one is for you..."



Skydiving will be happening in some weeks, but for now, I decided to tackle Fu Manchu... at least a mechanical one.


"Love Deeper
Speak Sweeter
Give forgiveness you've been denying
Someday I hope you get the chance to live like you were dying.
-TMcgraw

In fierce remembrance and love,
Christine

Glenn And Marketa

Glenn Hansard and Marketa Irglova received the Oscar for the song "Falling Slowly" from the movie 'Once' !!

Yay! I am so thrilled and and happy for them!!! Why do I mention this in my blog about surviving cancer? I have a secret to share.

For most of 2007, I was bed-ridden recovering from the bone-marrow transplant and a draining year in the hospital. Most of my time was spent shuttling back and forth from hospitals to doctor offices, then back to my apartment where I spent endless days a prisoner of low blood counts and fatigue.

One of the things that got me through this challenging period was music. But it was the soundtrack from the movie "Once" that I would play over and over again, carrying me through my most difficult times.

I have had many miracles happen in my life over the last two years and one of them was to be able to thank Glenn and Marketa for their indelible music, in person. I wasn't successful in holding back my tears, and neither was Glenn. I was shaking with gratitude as we gave/received the most heartfelt, loving, raw, pure, and fervid hug the world has ever seen. It felt like I finally made it home.


Thank you Glenn and Marketa, for reminding us that we are all truly bound together by hope.

Hugs,
Christine

Hope Begins in the Dark

Happy New Year everyone! Just got back in town. Lots to catch up on.

Healthwise, I'm doing okay. The GVH is back under control but still a bit shakey. My hair continues to grow in. (I actually have bangs now!) In a few weeks, I'll be celebrating a Birthday I thought I would never see. So thankful. It's been a long hard road but to be home and alive at 18 months post-transplant is not a bad place to be. I don't think you can get anymore extreme experiences: to be completely alone, locked away in a hospital room one year and then dancing in the middle of Times Square the next. What a blessed journey this has been! I hope everyone's New Year is going off to a good start. :)


This month sees the release of a new book by Jamie Reno; a staff writer at Newsweek and a Lymphoma survivor. In an effort to reach out to the newly diagnosed and to shed light on the patient perspective, Jamie interviewed 50 Lymphoma survivors ranging from CEOs to homemakers, doctors and soldiers, rock stars and PHDs. I'm story #15.

The survivors and stories in "Hope Begins in the Dark" are truly inspiring. The fact that they can all be found in one place is an incredible achievement and is a remarkable gift for all of us. The book was forged from survivors' own words in hopes of connecting those who have made it through the cancer journey to those who are just beginning their first steps. For anyone affected by Lymphoma, it is a must read.

Jamie secured a grant whereby he can give free copies of the book to
hospitals, support groups, patients, doctors and advocates. If you know anyone who you feel would benefit from this wonderful program, please feel free to forward the website.

Any proceeds from the book goes towards finding a cure.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I received this e-mail recently and wanted to share. This comes from a man who has been through so much himself and yet found the courage to see past his own problems and help another human being:


Hello and Happy New Year!

As many of you may already know, I have been determined to be a donor match for a 10 year old boy with a life threatening illness. I entered the bone marrow registry less than a year ago through a drive being held by at the church of one of my drum students here in Simi
Valley. The drive was held to find a match for a women in their congregation who unfortunately passed away before one could be found.

In mid-November, I was contacted by the National Marrow Donor Program as a possible match along with 3 others for this boy. After further testing, it was determined that I was a match for all six antigens and was asked to give either bone marrow or stem cells. As it turns out I will be giving stem cells which in the case of the young boy are more beneficial. I am honored with this opportunity and take the responsibility very seriously.

The donation is scheduled for January 8th. On Friday 1/4/08, I will
begin daily injections of Filgristan, a drug to increase my stem cell
production. I will have only minor discomfort during this time and
expect to be able to continue to work. At the same time the boy will
begin receiving massive doses of chemotherapy which he will likely not survive should I become unable to donate for reasons such as becoming ill etc. This is a risk his family has decided to take considering the severity of his condition.

The donor/collection will take place at UCLA Medical Center. I will
have have blood taken from one arm and cycled through a machine that will extract my stem cells then cycle my blood back through my other arm. This will take only 6 to 8 hours and leave me a little tired, however, ready for work the next day.

I ask that each of you pray for my health leading up the donation and more importantly the health of the young boy leading up to and especially following the stem cell donation. His recovery period will be approximately 1 year. I hope it is Gods will to save the young life of this boy. I was told by the National Marrow Donor organization that the odds for him finding a match were similar to the odds of winning the lottery.

Please visit the National Marrow Donor site at marrow.org to find a donor event. It takes a few short minutes to become part of their registry, just a swab from your cheek. There are over 60,000 people at any given week in the U.S. waiting for a donor match and anyone can make a difference in someone else's life.

H.A.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -


Continue the Love.....


Christine

Priestley Hugs for the Holidays

Jason Priestley gives good hugs.

Toluca Lake held their annual Christmas Parade and Open House last night, replete with carolers, bagpipers, a bevy of cookies and candy and, for the 24th year, the Magical Christmas Caroling Truck.

Once again, Cinema Secrets, opened their doors and hosted a Marrow Drive during the festivities. My friend, Jerome Williams is still in need of a marrow donor and once again, A3M was there to lend a hand.

After we spoke, Jason was eager to join the registry and immediately said "yes", walking straight up to the sign-up table. The lovely Aileen Malig walked him through the steps of what it takes to become a donor. Ms Aileen is one of A3M's best.


The Cinema Secrets family was generous, kind and full of life. They give so much to their community and are role models for how good business and good people can make a difference. Debra (above with pink scarf) was the main instigator of good. Not only is she beautiful but she is an angel immeasurable.



Even though people were busy shopping, snacking and parade watching, many took the time to sit down, swab their cheeks and apply to the registry. As usual, people had a lot of questions, but once they understood how easy and how awesome it is to be a marrow donor, they were reaching for the swabs. It was like a big party. The whole evening was a blast and probably one of the most fun marrow drives we've ever held!


Anyone can save a life. Even Beverly Hills, 90210 types. :)

Happy Holidays Hugs!

-cp

Oh What a Night

***(The photo upload isn't working today so I had to improvise.
Sorry for the weird layout!)***

So a funny thing happend to me this week. A friend called from a party in New York
and said that a bunch of people there saw me on TV a few days ago.  
I thought, “Wha?”
 
I didn’t even know there were TV news cameras at A3M’s Gala event last weekend.
It was an amazing and very surreal night and yours truly got a taste of what it
feels like to be a mini-celebrity.  
 
Once we were seated for dinner, my friend Jerome said “Hey, that’s you.”  Again, I
said “Wha?” turned around in my chair and (trumpets please) there is a HUGE shiny
poster to the left of the stage.  There I am, all 12 feet of me, my head three feet across
and (horror!) dancing like a dork in the $8 green 80’s dress from Prom Night!  Adding to
the weirdness were quotes from my writings, layered to the side of and below my
exuberant image.  It looked like one of those Laker flags at Staples Center.
 


The elegant dinner consisted of hundreds of people.  Asian-American actors were
honored and people spoke. Then it was time for my speech.  People were clinking
glasses and jangling forks and I thought, “Oh, great. Everyone’s busy eating.”  But I
leaned on the podium anyway and began to read my speech.  Some sentences in, I
realized I had not looked up and the room had gone eerily quiet.  Still reading the
speech, I lifted my head to see a cornfield of eyes locked on my face.  Even the wait
staff had become paralyzed in mid-service, clutching water pitchers and empty salad
plates.
 
The speech ended in a burst of applause and I slinked back to my chair, humbled once
more.  A tap on the shoulder, I turn around and there smiles Yuji Okumoto. He said
“Beautiful words. Incredible story.  You’re an inspiration.”  But all I could think was “Oh
my GAWD!  You’re the guy from Karate Kid II !”  Here’s the pic to prove it.
 


After dessert, the VIPs sauntered into the main theater.  I had to rush backstage
because I was basically the “opening act”.  As I came down the hallway, every security
guard had an earpiece and as I walked by, they would press their fingers against their
ears ala Mission Impossible.  The communiqué was “Christine is coming down the main
hallway and headed towards the stage door”.  Wha?  What am I?!  Aerosmith?!



The main act was Martin Nievera, who has been described as the “Ricky Martin of the
Philippines”.  We barely had a chance to bond before I was ushered from the green
room to the stage.  It was the first time I saw the theater and when I looked up, what
went through my head was “O.M.F.G.!!!!!”  The place was HUGE.
 



It reminded me of a Vienna opera house.  There was a Mezzanine AND three additional
tiers.  Gulp.  The MCs for the evening darted past me and onto the stage and (adding to
the surrealism) began to talk about someone named “Christine Pechera”.  Then the
room hushed once more and projected on the giant movie screen was the latest short
film of my story.  So I’m standing there, watching this film and living through the
transplant all over again.  Up on screen, I am in cotton hospital gown, bald, bloated and
in turmoil.  It was quite a contrast to my silk red evening gown, heels, coiffed hair and
the undeniable realization once more of “Wow. I’m still breathing…  this kicks azz!”
 
The film ends and a nudge from the stage manager has my heels echoing across the
stage to the podium.  The place was cavernous.  After the applause died down, I
squinted into the white-hot spotlight and for a brief second, had to resist the urge to
raise my arms ala Evita and sing, “Don’t cry for me ArgenTINA!”  
 


Since the same hundreds of people from the Gala dinner were now peppered in the
audience of perhaps 2000, I had prepared a completely different speech.  At one point,
I had the entire theater inhale and exhale slowly as one.  That was pretty awesome. 
 
After I spoke, I thought, “Great, my job is done. Time to relax” and I snuck to my chair
in the audience. Martin Nievera bursted onto the stage and rocked the house.  I was
enjoying the music when suddenly things went Twilight Zone again.  I heard my name
bellowing from the huge speakers, echoing all around.  “Where is she?!  Where is
Christine Pechera?!”  cried out Mr. Nievera.  My eyes widened. “Oh NO, he isn’t!”  The
house lights came up and Martin was now at the edge of the stage, hand on his brow as
if peering through the fog for a distant ship.  Oh well… you only live once… so I bolted
up from my seat, frantically waved my arms and screamed “I’m HERE Marteeeeeen!!!!!”
The entire audience in the orchestra section around me was sitting low in their seats and
there I was bopping up and down like a Jack-In-The-Box.  As soon as I stood up, there
was a collective gasp as in “Oh my God, she is sitting right HERE?!  Holy shmokie!”  I
guess should have asked for a box seat?

 

Anyway, Martin spots me and says some nice things, which makes my cheeks blush.
Then the lights go down, the spotlight hones in and Nievera SERENADES me from the
stage!  It was like one of those teenage Rock’n’Roll fantasies where Elvis picks YOU
out of the crowd, points and says “Hey you.  (hubbahubba) Yeah you. (a-hubba) I’m
singing this next song just for YOU.”  The song was called Wildflower and the lyrics
went something like ”She’s made it.  She’s finally made it. She’s blooming wide, like a
wildflower.”
 
At intermission, I decided to go to the lobby to look at the items in the Silent Auction.
With my “entourage”, we passed the earpieced security guards, pushed beyond the
stage door and out into the crowd.
 


I never made it to the Silent Auction tables.  
 
I couldn’t walk more than a step or two before a nice man wanted a picture or an
excited lady wanted to meet or another wanted to share her story.  I tried my best to
answer all questions and fulfill all requests but had to retreat backstage when it became
too much.  But backstage, photos were taken with the choir, the stage managers,
members of the band, press people and of course, Martin Nievera.

 

Towards the end the evening, a staff member of A3M approached me and said, “I don’t
know what you said or did but the marrow drive in the lobby is out of control!”  When I
last checked there were well over 100 people signed up and more to go.  It was the
most registrants A3M had ever seen on their annual Gala night... ever.  More signed up
than in the last five Gala nights combined. Cool!
 
As one of the founders of A3M said, “This was a magical night”.  And it was.  I met
some incredible people and heard some amazing stories of survival. This included other
BMT survivors and those recently diagnosed.  In the end, we are all in this together. 
My goal for the night was about creating awareness, spreading the word, and saving
lives.  I wanted to inspire others to speak up, to live, to DO something.  I think we,
(that is EVERYONE who contributed to the Gala fundraiser) can say we changed a
small part of the world that night.  On posters and invites, the evening was fittingly
called the “Miracles” concert.


 
Long after the concert was over, there remained a serpentine line outside waiting as
Nievera signed autographs at a table.  I was spent from all the attention and just wanted
to go home, light some candles and soak in a hot bath.  As I walked out, Nievera’s PR
guy called out to me, and turned to Nievera exclaiming, “Christine is LEAVING!”  Martin
jumped from his chair and we hugged across the velvet ropes.  He whispered, “You stay
healthy”.  I gushed, “You stay awesome.”  (I’m such a cheeseball!)
 
As I walked out to leave, a small group of people followed.  I guess they wanted to
watch me climb into my limo and wave as I headed back to my swanky mansion in
the Hollywood Hills.  The problem: There is no mansion and there was no Limo.  Instead
everyone was treated to a walk into the parking lot and the sing-song of my car.
“Beep-Bip-BOOP!” 
 
The engine purred, I shifted gears, and headed towards the Freeway back to Reality.  

xo,
cp

Writing for Wellness

Today marks the release of "Writing for Wellness: A Prescription for Healing". I am honored to be one of the many contributing writers in this life-changing book.

"Writing for Wellness" is based on the writer's group of the same name at City of Hope, a group I have been part of since my first treatment at the cancer center.

The book illustrates how one can cope, connect and heal through writing. It contains inspirational submissions by cancer patients, caregivers, survivors and family members. Truly, it is a rare glimpse into the minds and hearts of people going through one of the greatest trials of their life. It is also a practical "how to" for anyone who wants to learn how writing can help you heal.

The City of Hope writing program, presented in the book, was developed by Julie Davey, a former writing and journalism professor and two-time cancer survivor.

Because of the book, the writing program is already being adopted at other hospitals across the country. We, the writers, ultimately hope that the healing and sharing we experienced in our little group will be re-created and repeated for others. By sharing our words, we hope to help many who are going through grave and uncertain times.

The book is available through many sources, including Amazon.com.

All proceeds from the book go to City of Hope.

Hugs,
Christine

pre-Prom Update

We have so much to celebrate this weekend. My father's voice broke
apart on the phone when he realized that this "Celebration of Life"
was actually happening. I cried too. Who would have guessed that
this devastating nightmare would have such a fairytale outcome. I'm
so thankful for every little thing, every little moment of every day.

The results of the "one-year" Bone Marrow Biopsy came back 100% donor.
In the past, "100% donor" meant "promising" or "a good sign". The
marrow also came back "clear". This triple-confirms that the cancer
has completely vanished. At 13 months out, it is safe to officially
say that the donor marrow has taken and that the transplant is
successful.

My brother and I in the fountain at Cal Anderson Park in Capitol Hill

I just returned from Seattle, my first trip since all this began so
long ago. When the plane lifted off the tarmac my heart burst with so
much happiness that I couldn't stop tearing up. It wasn't until we
reached altitude that I let it sink in... I am finally free. Up in
Seattle, I met more people whose lives were changed by this crazy
journey. A church that conducted a marrow drive honored me, my family
and my friends C and M. I also met someone whose life was literally
saved by the campaign. It was incredibly humbling.

When the one-year milestone passed, I received the name and contact
info of my donor. I was handed a Chinese name and an e-mail address.
I stared at it for a week. I couldn't believe my donor, my hero, was
only a click away. We are now communicating via e-mail. His wife is
a 10-year survivor of APL. They have a son. My donor's name remains
anonymous to the public for now... at least until I get his permission
to reveal his name to everyone. I can't wait for the day when we will
meet face to face.

The Prom, to me, is like a high school graduation. It represents the
end of a special time and the beginning of an expanded time. We are
all blessed. I am in tears as I write this. Thank you, everyone
everyone everyone for seeing this girl through to the other side.

Love,
Christine

P.S. Let's ROCK the house.

Fireworks

Anniversaries and holidays conjure up all sorts of memories and emotions. The last few days have been very introspective and raw.

When thoughts and feelings are twisting inside, a walk is a good way to sort them out. It was on one of these walks last week that I was especially tormented by the memories and tears of last year. My plodding along the sidewalk was suddenly stopped short by a glint of color. Coming into focus, flitting right in front of my eyes, I swear, was a saffronbutterfly. Alright, it was actually pungent-orange in color but that's close enough for me. The tops of its wings appeared to have rhinestones on it. Shiny, glinting spots that caught flashes of the sun. Mesmerized, I slowly raised my hand palm up. On cue, the butterfly gently landed on my fingertips! I swallowed my gasp, for fear of scaring the beautiful creature away. Then I imagined what this scene must have looked like to passers-by. Some urbane Snow White in T-shirt and jeans, gazing at a butterfly on her fingertips. It gently raised and lowered it's shimmering wings. Looking at it, I was hoping for some profound message, some great epiphany, the great existential answer to all the ancient questions about meaning and existence. But it just rested there for a bit before flitting away. I stood and watched it waft towards some blossoming bushes. Perhaps it was just a little wink from the universe.

This weekend I was visiting a friend's place and had the pleasure of picking plums, apricots and apples from the fruit trees. Summer was bursting everywhere. Heaven is the simple joy of precariously cradling an armful of fresh-picked fruit, while reaching up to pluck yet another ripe plum.

Last year, on the eve of the transplant July 4, in the midst of great uncertainty and fear, a glass partition stood between me and my friend M. I lamented that I was in the hospital, on my favorite day of the year. And I cried out against the statistics that said I would never see another summer. From my bed and through the glass pane, M and I promised each other that we would be together "next year" and I would be healthy and cancer-free and we'd watch the Fireworks outside, under the stars, and drink wine and hug and toast to life. Last night, we did just that. Along with a few other friends, we went to the Hollywood Bowl for the Fireworks show. I felt something in me burst as the sky lit up with sparks and fiery whistles. Everything about that moment was what I so earnestly prayed and hoped for, all alone in that dark hospital bed a year ago. Of course the tears would not stop running down my face. It felt like I finally made it home.

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An edited version of what I wrote last July 4:

the night before the transplant i am sending love out in all directions from my bed. From my window tonight, I could see the entire horizon ablaze with fireworks. It was the most spectacular July 4th I've ever seen….. Yes, I'm a little scared and a little anxious, but I'm just filling myself with love and gratitude and faith to make it through the next 24 hours. So, sending sparks and fireworks to everyone from my heart to yours. I will be praying all night tonight. Praying that a year from now we will be watching fireworks together. And that 50 years from now we'll still be craning our necks to the sky to shout out "oooh and"aaah".

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July 4th is my thanksgiving. It's about uniting with friends and community and taking the time to enjoy life together. I've seen too many who succumbed to cancer this past year. Beautiful husbands, brilliant girls, promising sons. I live my life fully in honor of them. I am so blessed to have reached this point. I have scans and tests at the end of the month to see if the transplant will be a long term success.


This year, I hope the Fireworks remind all of us of all our blessings.

As ever,
Christine


P.S. July 5, the actual transplant day, I made another fun "next year" wish that will come true. That'll be in my next post!